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April 21st, 2016

Hello Readers, 

This is a photo I took with the Lomo Holgaroid Artemesia sent to me for my birthday. It's of my favorite tree in the park near my apartment in Philly, of which one half has white flowers and the other, pink. 

This is a photo I took with the Lomo Holgaroid Artemesia sent to me for my birthday. It's of my favorite tree in the park near my apartment in Philly, of which one half has white flowers and the other, pink. 

I'm currently in Bex's house on Long Island as I write this. Tomorrow, we leave on our journey to Minneapolis, visiting Chicago on the way and potentially Milwaukee and Detroit on the way to Toronto, then back to NYC. I'll help Bex move to Queens in the beginning of may, hang out for the week, and then I fly out from JFK to Israel yet again. 

I left Philly on the 19th. I won't see it again until August, and I already miss it. I miss the spring trees and seeing the leaves come out all the way. I miss my room and my bed. 

This whole spring has been a lesson in missing. I miss my partner, whom I have not seen since February 1st - though we skype almost daily. I miss Israel; my friends there and the food and the land that has become so dear to my heart, as fraught and complex as it is with the political situation. I love it out of that context, through the people and the feel of warm Mediterranean waves, velvet sands between my hands. The visits to the north, the warm heat enveloping me as I overlook the Kinneret. As I look off to see what I believe was Syria in the distance while I ate gnocchi and pet a stray. 

I have missed many places and sensations. The winding hills of Alfred, NY. The scent of photo chemicals and clay between my fingers. A violin in my hands. Lilacs in spring and woodchucks eating the crab apples. Hugging a Christmas tree, prickles on my face, snow in my hair, blowing dandelions into the wind and talking to bees. The cold of the waterfall, the peatically striated and worn down rocks. 

I'm always carrying around snapshots in my head of things, places, people, and sensations that I miss. 

With Israel, though, it feels like half my heart is there - as cheesy as that sounds. I'm torn between my friends and life there, molded over two months last summer, and my friends and life here. 

What are your snapshots? 

Until next time, 

C